This past week I had the pleasure of presenting to a group of employees and leaders of Givaudan. I presented on ways that employees and leaders can make a positive impact in their own lives and the lives of their employees and colleagues. We went through many of the key pillars that have been highlighted in this blog including ESTABLISHING BOUNDARIES, BOUNDARY RECOVERY (I put all of us on Boundary Recovery in this gathering), TEACHING PEOPLE HOW TO TREAT YOU and THE VALUE OF GRATITUDE. A new addition to the discussion was a guide to feeling fulfilled. Note I did not say achieving fulfillment; feeling fulfilled is all you need to be content and happy in the place that you are in.
When my boys were young, I read to them a book called “How Full is Your Bucket?” by Tom Rath and Mary Reckmeyer. This is the story of a young man who learns from his grandfather that everyone has a bucket above their head that they walk through life with. When this bucket is full of water then the person feels good, content, confident, happy. When their bucket was empty, they were sad, angry, frustrated. The story follows the young boy though a no good very bad day. As the day goes on you can see the water dripping out of his bucket until it is nearly empty. Later in the day he is recognized by a teacher for a good paper and there is one drip of water that falls back into his bucket. As the afternoon proceeds, he continues to have friendly and positive experiences that continue to fill his bucket. At recess when he walks outside, he notices that every other person also has a bucket, and he can see all of them above their heads. This young man proceeds to pick out the kids that have empty buckets and does or says something nice which results in “filling their bucket”; and unexpectedly to him, in filling someone else’s bucket he also has even more water plop into his bucket.
There is an adult version of this book, I personally prefer the children’s version as it is easier to read, and I am a visual learner so the pictures of buckets above everyone’s heads is helpful to me. So how do you “feel fulfilled”? The easy answer is you figure out what fills your bucket and then you find ways to fill someone else’s bucket.
When finding what fills your bucket, you start with your personal life. Make sure that with the free time you have, you choose activities that fill your bucket. These may include making tough choices on things like where and how you volunteer at your kids’ school, who you spend your free time with, trying new hobbies to see what intrigues you (and keeps you wanting more); and most importantly scheduling time for you!
When it comes to filling your bucket at work, getting involved in activities outside of your day-to-day role that you have a genuine passion for are big bucket fillers. For example, I am the co-chair for our global network of women’s mentorship program. Mentorship is clearly something I have a passion for, working on that passion on such a massive platform fills my bucket daily. Mentoring someone or finding a mentor at work can also help you leave a conversation feeling full. On the other hand, when I was asked to join an advisory group on finance practices… that was a hard NO!
After defining what fills your bucket, then you can work on ways to fill someone else’s bucket, and in return fill yours as well. In our personal lives, in most cases this comes naturally, we do nice things to help out our neighbors and friends, we take care of our families. However, we often forget to do this at work leaving us and our colleagues feeling exhausted and beaten up by the end of the week, sometimes just by the end of the day. Ways you can fill someone else’s bucket at work:
- Listen; be a mentor – you do not need to have all the answers, just listen.
- Send a thank you to someone once a day – put it on your “to-do” list, say thanks.
- Give recognition – Send an email or even better, a handwritten note. Start a link recognition chain in the office where people can write down someone, they want to recognize on colorful strips of construction paper and start a chain of recognition to grow and be seen around the office.
- Find ways to connect; we are all human and connections are instant bucket fillers. Ways to do this are taking walking meetings, travel to work with employees and colleagues, take them out for dinner. Recognize birthdays and celebrate each other’s successes.
- Have ice breakers at team meetings to encourage connections. For example, what was your favorite concert ever? What is your favorite food. The joy of learning something new or finding something in common with someone will fill everyone’s bucket.
- Cover for someone that needs a helping hand. Instead of judging a colleague or employee that is drowning, offer to help. Gratitude has tremendous value.
WHEN YOU FILL SOMEONE ELSE’S BUCKET; YOU WILL FEEL FULFILLED
The Heart of the Middle 