LEADERS LISTEN

“Leaders who don’t listen will eventually be surrounded by people who don’t speak.” Andy Stanley

I have decided that the single most underappreciated and yet most difficult skill to develop as a manager is the skill of listening.  Listening is more important than speaking, more important than negotiating, more important than leading.  Without the ability to listen, none of the other skills truly matter.  A leader that does not listen, leads with only their own thoughts and ideas instead of cultivating the needs and inspiration from their team members.  It is like an orchestra conductor conducting from a faraway balcony with noise cancelling headphones and a blindfold.  The orchestras sound, feeling, speed, noise level and individual contributions just don’t matter.  The result is an off key, out of balance, unenjoyable symposium.

My personal confession is that I find it very challenging to be a great listener.  I am naturally a talker, a fixer and I become very impatient with conversations or presentations that are not straight forward and concise.  When someone takes 10 minutes to answer a single yes or no question, it sounds like nails on a chalkboard in my head.

Listening is outside of my comfort zone and it is something I continually need to work on.  When one of my sales managers has an issue, I so quickly want to just jump in with the answer or the action that will lead them to the answer.  It takes me consciously reminding myself that I have one mouth and two ears for a reason. 

I have worked with all types of leaders in my 25 years.  The ones I have respected the most are the ones that have taken the time to listen.  I am sure there were times that they found it challenging to just sit and listen but when a leader listens, the employee often finds a solution on their own through processing out loud.  As challenging as it can be, the most effective listening skill I like to use is asking probing questions.  Listening to the problem and then asking probing questions that will lead my team in the direction of a potential solution but also to allow the space for them to discover that solution on their own.

In the next week I am going to challenge myself to listen more and listen better.  It is a skill that I need to continue to refine.  I may even ask some of my colleagues, “How are my listening skills?”  My employee reviews have often included the feedback that I need to listen more and talk less.  I can see now that this critique is very true.  For those of you that would like to join my listening challenge this week, I include for all of our benefit an active listing checklist to use as we work to improve on the most important leadership skill a manager can master.  If at the end of my career if my team says about me “she was a great listener”; I know I will have made a difference.

Managing in the middle, easy steps to improved listening:

• Ask thought-provoking (probing) questions.
• While the other person is responding, give them your full attention.
• Reflect back on what they have stated; “my understanding of what you just said…”
• Acknowledge and empathize if needed.